How to be more confident.

DAY 207 of 365

Confidence comes from here. 

Inside.jpg

Not from here.

outside.jpg

This one is extremely simple but it is something near to my heart.  It pains me to see people lose their confidence or never have any to begin with.  I grew up extremely confident, borderline arrogant and as time goes down life can beat you down.  You can date someone who is mentally abusive, you can have a streak of failures, fuck you can even lose your looks.  

Shit happens through out life that can wear our confidence down.  Yet confidence is still one of the most appealing things when it comes to attraction.  Confidence as you get older is a conscious choice.  Once you flip the switch to IDGAF what people think about me, the world becomes your oyster.  

This leads me to my next point I dated someone for many years who has little self confidence.  It was really hard for me to understand or even tolerate but I tried to be patient.  How could someone be so pretty and lack so much confidence.  How could someone second guess every step they make.  I fell into this trap hard before and lacking confidence was a terrible feeling and I had to claw my way out.  The above diagram says it best but I will spell it out for you.  Confidence does not come from the external it comes from within.  You can have the best car, the nicest clothes, hottest significant other it doesn't matter.  If you aren't Rick Ross in your own head no amount of materials or exercise will change your confidence.  

How I took action on this.

STOP being indecisive.  Make small decisions quickly and stick with them.  Ex. order your food within 2 minutes of seeing a menu, and then stick with your choice. 

Be foolish.  Say whatever comes to your head.  If it gets you in trouble you'll be sure not to say that shit again.  But you will have at least said something. 
A closed mouth doesn't get fed. 

Talk to random people often.  Old ladies in the super market, girls your age at the book store, bank tellers, your crush, people on the internet etc. 

Other than that share.  DOn't give a fuck what people think.  There opinions literally mean nothing and have no affect on your life.